I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize