Tell her she can't have a vagina
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
