so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
