I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize
