Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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