she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
