It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
she told me i tasted like america
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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