Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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