What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
These tits shall not be calmed
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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