I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
ttyl tear gas
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Mom said you looked used
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
