Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I love having hate sex.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Randomize
