nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
