Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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