People with herpes should wear stickers.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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