my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
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