"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
