You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize
