found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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