belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize