Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
