woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
