Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
What drink are we having for lunch?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
