That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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