the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
