I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
