i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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