My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
