i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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