Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
