spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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