She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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