Non-Jews are for practice
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
