so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize