Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
time to smoke my breakfast
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize