do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
