I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I can't turn off my feet"
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
