Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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