I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
