I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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