Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
