Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
whose parrot is this?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
