haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
