Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
