And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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