i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
