it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
