3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
