Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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