I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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