Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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